11:32 pm! My daughter is texting, checking on me. How did I get so lucky? My friend asked if I would use her ticket to see Phantom of the Opera? Of course, I replied. I just moved to San Francisco few weeks ago, and literally dropped the boxes and went on a trip right after. Just got back few days ago. What a great way to start living as if I live here! I’ve been to San Francisco many times, but “visiting,” really. I always felt like a tourist: driving nervously, last minute expensive parking, taking all the wrong turns, and confused about all the crossing lines on the streets and above in the sky.
The Bus Route I was determined to take the public transportation even though, I was totally confused about the lingo (I kept hearing line, bus, muni, etc.) There’s a planner/scheduler online which asks you where would you like to go, where from, and “when” would you like to arrive. The show starts at 8, but I entered arriving at 7:30 to allow for “incidents.” (Now I know why old people are always early 🙂 Apparently, I had to take the 5R (R for rapid – lingo, ahem!) at 40th Ave. and Fulton. It was a short walk from my place, but mind you, it was going to be dark on the way back. The planner in me decided to go park my car close to the bus station, walk home, get ready and then walk back to the station. My car will be there when I get back to drive home instead of walking in the dark.
And Return? I was not going with “I am sure there must be a way,” because I don’t know what time the buses go home to bed (my grandson recently asked me??)What time to return? I didn’t know when the show ends. Oops! Googling (no matter how you phrase the question) didn’t help at all. I called the theater! The recording was very nice and kept on announcing my position in the queue: 34, 29, … Finally! She said it ends at 11! And, no worries, there are plenty of buses to take you home (I was sure there were many, but I just wanted the right one.) I didn’t want to tell her in my experience when it hits the fan, it’s a hurricane. At this time, driving like the tourist, and expensive parking, was beginning to look good. But, no! I was on the “I’m a city girl diet.” Plus, I could always call a cab. No worries.
Wooh! Finally both routes figured out! I kept on studying, screen capturing, and whatever I could do to save both routes on phone, short of printing. I found my printer in one of the boxes, but no papers. I looked to use the blank back of any printed paper around, damn double sided printing! Checked manuals hoping to find one of those “this page is INTENTIONALLY left blank” papers. Never understood the intention, but boy it would been very much appreciated now.
Ready, Set, Go! All ready, I started walking early (had my heels in a bag, like a city girl (the old kind) and noticed, the phone is out of juice. Darn! All my plans, map, route, etc. was on the phone. But it was early and my car was near the bus station, nice. . To charge or not to charge? Worrying about missing the bus. I went and sat at the station, trying to memorize both routes, in case my phone really dies. I really MISSED the cell phone battery pack I bought 2 years ago on Christmas for emergencies! Oh wait, I can’t call a cab either. Worries! SF weather forecast for Sonia: shitty hurricane!
Murder on Fulton St. I just noticed that when I return at midnight, I will be dropped off across the street; but my car is on this side! The Hitchcock in me kicked in and 12000 scenarios of how I will be killed walking to my car in midnight, or car jacked the minute I open my car door, rushed in. I could see the headlines next day: San Francisco woman attacked and killed walking from the bus station to her car. Should I move the car? No, no time. Should I just drive? No, no chickening out. For heaven’s sake, I teach courage!! I need to literally walk my talk, even in midnight. I decided that I need to let go of the fear or else it will be there every moment of the show and for the rest of my life in the city. If tonight is the night, at least I was killed as a local! That in itself is an accomplishment!
Finally The Bus!! arrived. I got on and asked the driver if I can get off at McAllister and Leavenworth (my daughter told me it’s always good to ask, although it REALLY made me feel like a tourist)? He said it would go as far as Van Ness. Huh? No clue what to do with this information. I said “I want to go to Orpheum theater “and he REPEATED: I stop at Van Ness; you can either take this or wait for the next one. Oh, I asked, “does the next one go to McAllister and Leavenworth? While feeling crappy, that I was holding the bus.” I don’t know (with a stare !) I got off and hoped the next bus be the one. It didn’t say on the scheduler the 5R bus may or may not stop at the station at their discretion. The next bus was out of service. I thought, maybe I should just drive? That idea got voted out right away. Finally, I got on the right bus! Paid the exact change that I prepared this morning (had one for coming back too, can’t be prepared enough) and he handed me a ticket. Sat right across the driver to make sure I get off at the right place. After I settled down, I looked at my ticket: OMG! My own first official bus ticket. I could picture it in a frame on the wall – like the one dollar bill in a liquor stores. I looked at the two people sitting across from me. They looked local. Their eyes were open but they weren’t “looking” at anything. Yes, I did look like a tourist. A short, dressed up tourist with dangling legs wearing high heels like a 5 year old wearing mom’s shoes. I was trying not to look excited. I always thought it was funny when people were dressed up on the bus. Somehow, bus and elegance don’t go. Same as when people are all dressed up in the wedding and do the chicken dance. It is hilarious. Not to mention lining up at the buffet table wearing long gowns and tux with plates, napkin, and forks in one hand, glass of wine under arm, leaving the other hand free, checking out the food and if they are anything like me, worrying about getting the table scrap when it is their turn, all the while pretending that all is well.
The bus driver gave me the whole 411 of the bus, muni, etc. Apparently, there’s a system to this madness. I was pretending that I am listening, but I was worried about who else is watching me and thinking: tourist! Finally, I looked back, pretending I was looking at a shop out the window and there were only 4 people on the bus and all taking a nap! Tourist will never sleep on the city bus, no sir.
Arrived, got off the bus and walked to the theater. I slowed down, taking it all in. Frankly I was tired from thinking and judging, 18000 miles/hour . God should’ve given me a speeding ticket just for that! Now, I was present. I was joyous. So proud of myself that I actually thought of a getting selfie in the Civic center and in front of the theater as if I conquered, you know, First time. But no batteries, I remembered. Thank God. I suck at taking selfies (pictures in general.) And that’s a tourist thing anyway! I couldn’t wait to tell people that I am one of them, hey I live here too.
Feeling The Blue Room
The lady took my ticket and told me that sitting starts soon and “the BLUE room” is on the right. Another code word, I thought. She saw my face and said: “the bar.” Oh darn, I don’t drink because I get headaches, but what a great way to celebrate getting here. I was feeling good. Not over or under dressed and had enough time to have a drink and mingle and deal with headache later. I looked at the menu/price list (don’t know why?) and noticed a tray of candies, nuts, and cookies for sale. What is this? Back to school night? Picturing men in tux popping up skittles, made me smile. I ordered a gin and tonic: $14! And it didn’t even hurt! To quiet my dad’s voice in my head (its way cheaper to drink one at home; better quality, less ice, etc. it’s a rip-off; gee Dad, stop it,) I tipped the guy too. That would’ve definitely killed my dad if he wasn’t already gone. Best money I ever spent!
Meet My Man … met this lady and her man in the corner. That’s how she introduced him. As if he was assigned to her before the show: mam, here is your ticket; please pick up man #12 from the line; enjoy the show! I started with: “I just moved here!” Waiting for the (drum roll please) WELCOME TO OUR CITY SONIA, YOU GONNA LOVE IT! She laughed: you must be crazy! We live in Sacramento and love it. Great! I kept the smile going. I’m not going to stop announcing my move that easy, nop! Her “man” was drinking water, and I commented: good for you! He said: drinks here are outrageous; we drink ours before we get here, or we go to a bar nearby. Oh, wow! dad? I went in to find my seat; on the isle and in a good location, thanks Lynn. I felt great. What a beautiful theater, Taking it all in; all those ornate walls, the ceiling, the curtain, wow! trying to imagine being there in 1930’s .. And then the big theater lights, wires, etc. total buzz kill. One couple walked right passed me all dressed up, eating liquorish! Really? I looked around a bit more. Many were dresses casual. I could’ve got away with my spandex pants and long tunic. Perhaps I bring a sandwich next time.
Next To Me
The two seats next to me were empty. A young tall, skinny lady with long hair without a strand out of place was sitting on the third chair. She looked very organic and wholesome. Sitting straight with her little “for the occasions” black bag on her lap, looked like she’d figured out the life thing; doing everything right: watching what she eats, saving for retirement and her trip to Europe in 5 years, wearing THE black long jersey skirt (which never wrinkles, also great “for the occasion”) and the dark blue top companion and the strand of pearl: ready. For the occasion!
A gorgeous couple came by and stood next to me. I was going to get up, but the girl said: no worries, we are coming back. They asked me if I wanted a drink; that was nice. I said “no thanks, I just had a gin and tonic.” They offered to get me another one. I thanked them, smiled and said: believe me I like to drink, but I get headaches. If I didn’t, I would be an alcoholic cause I like the taste so much. They came back with their drinks and sat right next to me. I said: oh, I didn’t know you could bring your drink in, or else I would’ve not washed my down so fast. She said: oh yeah, they put it in a sippy cup! Huh? Felt so cheated. I could hear my dad: next time, make one in your grandson’s sippy cup and bring with you. Actually, this time it was me? We settled and the show started. She elbowed me and offered her cup; no thanks, I am good, I said. She looked at me and said: honey, I am not asking you, I am telling you! I found my girl! I liked her right away. So, I sipped. After a while, she gave me a cup and said: now, my friend will get upset if you don’t sip from his cup, and I did. Although she insisted, I gave it back to her. Now, I am wondering if I should be worried? Hitchcock knocking!! Scenarios kept rushing: did they drop something in the drink? What’s next? Drugs? Ride home? Headlines: SF woman was beaten up to death behind The Orpheum Theater. I should really get a speed judging ticket. The show was great, although sometimes, I really wish there was a subtitle somewhere; especially when they were all singing different songs at the same time. I couldn’t understand, but seemed like they were arguing?? Makes you wonder: don’t you wish we would sing our arguments? Imagine? Arguing with your spouse, with your children, in court? All while signing the words??
Intermission!
At intermission, I did what I do best: get in line for ladies room, have to go or not; I’m sure when it’s my turn, I can go. Every time, I am in a bathroom line, I think: there should be a better design. More toilet stalls will not solve the problem. I don’t know what the heck women do beside their business. I am always so in rush that I flush the toilet the minute I get in, and almost don’t lock the door! (really not recommended.) Have there been any studies done on this? How about pants that are open in the crutch, so we can use womanly designed urinals ? Or, no doors on women’s stalls? Perhaps, a timer that rings loud and doors open automatically after 3 minutes? Somebody, do something! I was talking to this young girl and a lady who was waiting for her daughter (bathroom bonding.) Daughter came, and as they left, she looked at the young girl and said: your mom is so cute! Yup that was my cue for getting old! The word used to be pretty, attractive, perhaps funny, but cute? Thank you??
The End .. I asked around to find the way to Hyde. Apparently no one lived there. Tourists? It was 10:30 (not 11, mind you;) I finally walked to the bus station and asked a young man if it was #5, to be sure! He nodded yes. I said “you know, I just moved here, so not familiar with stuff yet,” and continued,” I had a hard time finding the bus schedule online,” I explained more, “because for example (I am on the roll now,) I thought the show ends at 11 and …” He replied looking very (as a matter of fact”ish”): the buses run every bla bla … Until bla bla Monday thru bla bla .., reciting the schedules. And most shows are two to two and half hours, he continued: but some Las Vegas shows are shorter because … . Wow! He gave the rundown of all different kind of shows (NY, Las Vegas, and SF.) I noticed an accent. So, I asked: when did you move here? He looked at me and said: I am visiting from Argentina, tourist really!
I had a headache.
With love, Sonia
Sonia Shafazand Life Coach & Mentor to Individuals
Who Want a Better, Happier Life NOW, Not Later! P.S. Sign up and receive immediately my Free Audio: The #1 Thing That’s Keeping You From Enjoying the Life You Truly Desire – see the box on the top right? Enter your info there! Disclaimer: I know this text may have lots of grammatical errors. Sorry about that and I try to do better. But! If you can, focus on the message. If you can’t, then read about perfectionism. In fact, I will be writing about that soon. Let’s face it, you don’t have to learn Chinese to go to China and enjoy all it has to offer!